I Surrender

(Note: Today, I began writing about Surrender, only to find a piece I had written a couple of years ago, expressing my almost identical feelings about the same topic. And so this post is both a mix of my feelings then and now.)

Surrender. It seems to be a word that gets thrown around a lot. And I can’t say that I was ever very fond of it because I used to associate it with giving up. And I don’t like the idea of giving up a whole lot because it implies that I feel defeated or without strength.

But I have to be honest, these last few months have been all about Surrender for me and learning what it really means. Have I been in pain? Yeah, sometimes. Have I found all the reasons why things happen the way they do? No. I’m learning that for all the awareness we may have as people walking a ‘spiritual’ path, we may never know the reasons why some things are the way they are. Sure it can be helpful to see the blessings within our experiences, even search for them if we need to, but maybe the greatest peace comes from just accepting that life can be inexplicably mysterious and uncertain? I’m guessing that those who proclaim to have all the answers are probably the ones who….well, they are the ones who I am most weary of because it’s not being REAL. How can it be when we are always learning and growing? If we knew everything I believe we wouldn’t be living as human beings!
I like to pretend sometimes that I’m completely  with Divine Timing. But let’s face it, we all like to feel some kind of control and, of course, I have my fragile moments when I find myself clinging to every detail because I ‘just want things to be perfect’. As I lay awake late last night, wondering why my upcoming travel plans have been unusually confusing and unsettling, and arguing with my decision to re-schedule the flights for later in the year, I made the conscious choice to Surrender my  thought of what should happen and to trust that the situation is being taken care of for the highest good. And this morning, I received an ‘out of the blue’ call from my pianist asking me if I’d like to sing with her at a ‘disability awareness’ event in London on 8th September – a special opportunity that I would not be able to say yes to if I was sticking to my original itinerary! A sign? I think so!
So Surrender doesn’t mean giving up. It just means that sometimes, ‘doing’ is not necessary and that letting go is then the only thing left if we want to find some relief. Knowing that God/the Angels/the Universe are working behind the scenes for me (and everyone) is so comforting. It might take me a few minutes, hours or even days to get back to that place of trust but I am so grateful to live a life where I know that they are there to help me! It doesn’t mean life is without challenges but it does mean that it’s possible to find ways to deal with them and move forward as best I can. I’ve had enough moments in my life (like the one today) to realize that, far from being defeated, Surrendering and saying ‘I don’t know what to do. I hand it over’ fills me with a strength to continue on and allow miraculous outcomes to appear! And that has got to be worth learning, hasn’t it?!
With my love,
Anna
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7 thoughts on “I Surrender

  1. Totally makes sense. “I’m learning that for all the awareness we may have as people walking a ‘spiritual’ path, we may never know the reasons why some things are the way they are. ” Isn’t that the truth? I’m wary of know-it-alls too. lol. Does anyone really know it all? I don’t think I have met such a person, and if I did, “I don’t know”. 😛 You know I’d been struggling with..what should I do?? Tried to look at my gifts. Tried to look at courses. Tried to look into “titles”. No doors seem to be clearly opening. So I will try and surrender…I will be what I will be.I’ll let higher guidance show me the way. Now I hope I can surrender. Giving up struggle is a struggle too.

    • Yes, it’s definitely not easy to let go that is for sure! But I know that these things always become clear in time and they will for you! I think sometimes just asking yourself those questions helps to move energy and open the doors. So YAY for you for doing that! Keep me posted!

  2. Anna, how charming, insightful, and totally wonderful! I have recently surrendered control, and I have had many blessings bestowed upon me, many people contacting me for different things, many opportunities coming my way! And how wonderful to find those ways to work with ‘life’! I too, am tired of the know-it-all people, their energy makes me weary! I say to them, “So when did EVERYTHING get downloaded to your mind, that must really be a burden for your to carry”! I pray for those people, that they may be able to surrender some of their ‘knowingness’, and take an expample from those of us who look to our Higher Source for our guidance. I look to Spirit for guidance, and for strength in those times that God is calling me to surrender! So I say to you…. Surrender on….. Feel your way….. and count the Blessings that come with a time of surrender! 🙂 Hugs to you!

  3. (((((((Anna))))))))

    Soooooooooo coolio that your travels plans not working out did indeed HAVE a meaning and you get to sing on Sept 8th (yay! wohooo!) and was not meant to anger you. Maybe you even meet an important man there who brings your prince :-)Sometimes I yell at the angels if they are having bl**dy fun annoying the heck out of me and angering me when things don’t seem to work out the way they should (at least from my viewpoint of course) LOL Just yesterday I yelled at them, that why in God’s name did they not prevent me from running my big toe into the door frame -ouch!- which made the nail split open and I have to wear open sandals which show my toes to the wedding. Usually I don’t mind if something this trivial happens, BUT hello, I need to look my best at the wedding party in Canada. They rolled their eyes at me and stuck their tongues out -I swear- and they said “No one told you to hurry around like a heedless chicken and not watch your step. About bl**dy time you slow down girl.” LOOOOL Right! Gosh, one of these days they will really admit me to the loony bin… I’ve never before actually saw them sticking their tongues out LOL
    Well, control freak is my second name, so I absolutely know what you mean.
    Anyway, may the perfect dates arrive for your travel plans pronto and in perfect divine timing with awesome time abroads 🙂

    Love you!
    xoxooxoxoxxoxoox

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