Today, I write to acknowledge the voice that says I cannot. The incessant, nagging voice that has become increasingly loud at the first sign of an opportunity to share my writing more publicly. The voice that tries to convince me that there is nothing I could write that hasn’t already been done, and that even if there was, it could be far more eloquently and skillfully expressed by someone with a college education or at the very least, more experience of writing – and of life.
It is a hesitant, anxious voice that pulls me back to a time when I fully immersed myself in creativity, only to be exposed to a barrage of criticism and judgement. The voice that even pulls me away from sitting here, giving me countless reasons why I should divert my attention to something else more important. It is almost paralyzing in it’s assault, which only enforces the feeling that I am unqualified and incapable…
However, as I give this voice some space to air itself, I feel another warm, friendly tone rising up above the fear. The voice that reminds me, as it always does, that comparing myself to anyone or anything is completely unnecessary and who I am, the road I’ve travelled, and what I’ve learned along the way is unique; that as I show up, authentically as me, those who are drawn to my energy and my perspective will show up, too. Whether that be one, or a thousand or even a million people is not up to me, but it is up to me to decide to be the messenger I have always known myself to be. This soothing voice, fills me to the brim and coaxes me into remembering that this sense of purpose, this calling within my heart, is the only qualification I need. So all I have to do, as this moment proves, is to be REAL because the quest for human perfection is the number one reason for procrastination and inactivity. And, as if to lift me from my slumber, the voice gently repeats a truth I’ve heard many times: I am, as every other soul is, Divinely perfect. And this is my message. This is THE message within my writing here and maybe the only message there ever truly is: I am enough. We are ALL enough.
This is the voice of love, this is the Angels’ Voice. I am listening. I am allowing. I am sharing. I AM.
*Inspiration is inspiration. It is not logical or planned. It is spontaneous and magical. It is not to be justified or explained, because some things are just unexplainable. Except that it can make the non-sensical seem like the most sensible and only thing left to do. And turn an ordinary person, place and moment into the most extraordinary hero, journey and gift.
*This paragraph was written in 2011